3 Ways Finding a Financial Advisor Is Like Dating

The experience of dating can be a harrowing one. You have to put yourself out there and potentially sit through numerous awkward conversations over coffee until you find someone you manage to click with. And who knows how much money you'll spend along the way?

But if you're someone who wants a romantic partner in life, then it's important to put in the time to find the right person. And similarly, if you're in the market for a financial advisor, you'll want someone who can help you work toward your money-related goals, whether it's buying a house, putting your kids through college, or retiring with a robust IRA balance.

Recent data from Northwestern Mutual found that 70% of wealthy Americans are working with a financial advisor -- but that's nearly double the amount of the general population. So if you're without an advisor, you may want to ramp up your search.

But don't be surprised if the process of finding one reminds you of dating. Here's why that might happen.

1. You need to ask a lot of questions to find the right person

It's important to find a romantic partner with similar goals and values to yours. If you want kids, it's best to find someone who feels similarly about expanding their family. And you'll probably have to ask your fair share of questions to determine if the person you're dating is someone you can see yourself being with on a long-term basis.

Similarly, it's important to find a financial advisor whose personality meshes with yours, and whose skills are likely to lead you toward your goals. So as you interview potential advisors, ask lots of questions. Some of those might include:

• How much experience do you have?
• What investment strategies do you recommend for someone like me?
• What barriers do you see coming up on the way to meeting my goals?
• What's your communication style?
• What fees do you charge?
• How often will you update me on my progress/how often we will sit down to meet?

2. You need to establish a level of trust

You can't move forward in a romantic relationship without trusting the person you're with. Similarly, you can't put someone in charge of your money if you don't trust that they're an honest professional who has your best interests at heart.

One thing you may want to ask a financial advisor is whether they're a fiduciary. A fiduciary is someone who must put the best interests of their clients first at all times.

Of course, trust is something it takes time to build. You may not want to put a financial advisor in charge of all of your money right away, but rather, ease in. As they prove themself, you can put additional funds in their care.

3. It can be very difficult to cut ties

If you've ever had to break up with someone you've dated, you know how hard it can be. Similarly, it's not so easy to end a relationship with a financial advisor. And while the whole "it's not you, it's me" line works in both scenarios, that doesn't mean it's a comfortable situation to be in.

But just as there's no sense in continuing a romantic liaison with the wrong person, so too is there no sense in continuing to work with a financial advisor who isn't meeting your needs. And you'll know you're in the latter boat if you find that your advisor is hard to reach, doesn't listen to your concerns, and doesn't take the time to explain their strategy for your money. It's also okay to cut ties with a financial advisor if their fee structure changes and it becomes too high for you to comfortably afford.

Working with a financial advisor could be a smart move. But it's also important to find the right person for you and know what red flags to look out for, the same way you wouldn't want to commit to a romantic partner who isn't a good fit for you.